Can you guys believe we’re already four episodes into Creature Commandos! That’s over halfway through! The appetizer to the DCU has been quite an interesting ride so far.
As Gunn dabbles in his favorite tropes, we get to know a member of this task force every week. In this week’s Creature Commandos, we dive into the backstory of a familiar furry face, as well as learn the truth behind what may really be going on in Pokolistan and Circe’s true motivations.
BACK TO BACK
Things are getting quite steamy for the Creature Commandos when we pick back up here with Ilana and Flag making out something fierce. Flag tells Ilana that he and the Commandos must depart, having defeated and apprehended Circe, but Ilana insists on just killing the sorceress and sticking around a little longer.
We return to Belle Reve to find a familiar face, or should I say dye-beard. Steve Agee returns as the cowardly-yet-battle-hardened John Economos. We don’t get a word out of him before he is approached by a lady who looks pretty ticked.
The lady starts berating Economos with questions regarding her client, revealing herself to be The Weasel’s attorney. Economos identifies her as Elizabeth Bates, a character from the 1940s that you can learn all about here. Bates is demanding to know where Weasel is. Economos, still injured from the end of Peacemaker, is only able to offer an excuse that Weasel is sick and won’t stop coughing up hairballs.
READ: ‘Creature Commandos’: Who Is GI Robot?
The two peer out a nearby window to find Weasel exiting the Osprey, having just returned from Pokolistan with the other Commandos and Circe in tow. Flag tells The Bride she’s got this kind of thing handled and hopes they work together again down the line.
The Bride jokes that she didn’t know she had a choice in the matter before noticing a strange soldier beyond the fence. We jump to Frankenstein, yet again stalking The Bride, this time from a helicopter above Belle Reve, convinced that she’s got the hots for Flag based on how she’s looking at him. Frankenstein thinks it may be due to Flag’s luscious beard and assumes one of the pilots is making fun of his inability to grow a beard, sending Frank into a rage that results in the helicopter crashing.
Elizabeth greets Weasel, instead referring to him as John. The two have a good relationship, with Weasel expressing excitement over her arrival. Elizabeth questions Flag about where exactly Weasel was, talking about him with a good sense of humanity and revealing his full name as John Doe.
Flag and Economos meet Waller in interrogation, where Circe has been brought for questioning. Circe is asked about her motivations for wanting Ilana dead. The sorceress claims it is in pursuit of saving the world and that she can prove it by showing Amanda the future.
Waller takes the risk and lets Circe in, witnessing a future in which Pokolistan declares war on the world, with Ilana allying herself with Gorilla Grodd. Pokolistan forces lay waste to major cities like Gotham and Metropolis, with heroes such as Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Peacemaker, Starfire, and more impaled and made examples of.
Horrified, Waller calls in Isla MacPherson, a scholar on anything and everything Amazonian, who confirms Circe’s clairvoyance. This triggers Waller to order Flag and the Commandos back to Pokolistan with a new objective: kill Princess Ilana Rostovic.
In the commissary, The Bride and Dr. Phosphorous ease back into their incarcerated lives, with The Bride questioning the status of their relationship as if they were supposed to be friends now. Nina, on the other hand, is heckled by fellow prisoners Nosferata and Congorilla. The Bride doesn’t like this and promptly beats Congorilla, presumably to death… with a tray.
Back on the Osprey, Nina asks The Bride why she helped her back in the cafeteria. The Bride simply says that she owed her for almost getting her killed by Circe. Nina jokes that getting her gross food back doesn’t exactly equal almost getting her killed, and the two share a laugh. Nina asks why they’re going back to kill the princess, with both reiterating the same spiel given to them at Belle Reve: it’s on a need-to-know basis, and they “don’t need to know.” Nina asks if The Bride has ever killed someone. The Bride answers it like it’s nothing, while Nina, more reserved, asks if The Bride really thinks she looks like someone who’s killed.
THE FLAG AND THE FRANK
Flag disagrees with Waller and this new mission which results in him being dismissed and a new leader being assigned, The Bride.
Flag storms home, eagerly trying to get ahold of the princess in Pokolistan but is unable to reach her. What he doesn’t yet know is he’s being tailed by Frankenstein, who pulls up in a stupid little yellow car that he barely fits into.
READ: ‘Creature Commandos’: Who Is The Bride?
Slamming the stupid little car into a tree, Frankenstein bursts out of the vehicle and charges Flag right through his front door, accusing him of stealing who he believes to be his one true love. The two engage in a mighty fine bout of fisticuffs (Frankenstein slams Flag around his own house like an unsupervised toddler would a cat by its tail). Flag maneuvers his way onto Frankenstein’s back and quickly gets a gun on his head before Frankenstein starts uncomfortably laughing and crying again about…you guessed it, The Bride not wanting anything to do with him.
Frankenstein gushes about love, asking Flag if he’s seen the movie Titanic and comparing Flag to Leonardo DiCaprio. Frankenstein claims that his relationship with The Bride is like When Harry Met Sally and that one day she will realize how much she loves him. Flag offers that the two of them could help each other out, which Frankenstein very quickly agrees to, claiming them to be best friends.
A WEASEL’S TRUTH
Somewhere in Belle Reve, Elizabeth sits down with Weasel to show him a series of photographs, hoping to jog the mindless metahuman’s memory. Bates fully believes Weasel is innocent and is adamant about proving it, even though Weasel only tends to react by licking himself.
Beth snaps Weasel back into focus and directs him toward the photographs placed in front of him on the table. We flash back to a schoolyard full of children playing, who stumble upon Weasel hiding in the bushes. A little girl successfully lures him out with a half-eaten candy bar. The kids are able to successfully lure Weasel out with food.
We jump back to the present with Weasel holding the photograph of the little girl. For a second, you think there might be a thought behind those eyes, until he eats the photo.
Weasel joins the rest of the team on the journey back to Pokolistan, curling up next to Nina for a restless nap and dreaming up something fierce. We return to the schoolyard to find Weasel playing ball with the kids, accidentally running into the door and opening the school to the children. An old man passing by notices what’s going on and grows concerned for the children, running home to grab his gun and call the police.
The kids travel into the school, where they continue to play and snoop around the teacher’s desk, snatching a bottle of booze. The kids end up in the basement to retrieve the ball but continue to run around. One of the children stumbles across a box of matches, striking one just as the bottle of booze is knocked out of the other kid’s hands, and a fire breaks out nearby.
The old man approaches the children and Weasel, pointing his gun, firing off shots, and hitting a gas tank that causes an explosion, killing most of the children. Before the explosion goes off, Weasel notices this and pulls the little girl out of the way.
Weasel notices a little boy taking his last breath, watching him die in front of him. Unwilling to let another child die, he rushes for the little girl to help her out of the building just as the police arrive, noticing Weasel with the child and firing directly at him. The Weasel is struck multiple times, which results in him dropping the child. Weasel is forcibly held down by the police, who do nothing to save the very-much-still-alive child, forcing Weasel to watch the crumbling building crush her as he is dragged out.
As Weasel is dragged out of the burning school, we are dragged back to the present, where a squirming Weasel catches the attention of The Bride and Nina, who wonder what he could be dreaming about. To this, The Bride can only muster up: “Probably chasing squirrels.”
We are now halfway through Creature Commandos Season One! With only three episodes of Creature Commandos left and so much ground to cover, these next few episodes are sure to be hectic and fun. You can check out our other coverage of the series, like just who GI Robot is and also some background on the Lady-at-Law herself, Betty Bates!
Check out the trailer for Creature Commandos below!
